I can't deny it. I used to project my anger and stress to my loved ones. If I am going through something, I will be tensed and kind of spread the vibe. My vibe has killed many fun events. Guilty AS CHARGED!
Recently, I have started watching The Bold Type and I couldn't help to notice but all the 3 main characters have one thing in similarity. They do not project their stress on others. In fact, I am yet to see them screaming their lungs out to someone.
The way they talk is so calm and composed even though it looks like it is a good moment to scream the hell out to someone. That put me in deep thought. OMG. I have been doing it all wrong!
I am a vibe freak. I only hang out with people who give me a good vibe. Yet, when I am angry or stressed up, I always avoid meeting people. I don't want to mistakenly project my stress to them. Which I always end up doing. :(
Now I learned that I should stop avoiding people. Instead, I should start meeting people. Rather than sharing my stress with someone, I should instead talk to others about their day and talk about interesting stuff that can put my stress away. Even if it is for a little while.
If you're watching The Bold Type, have you seen how Sutton talks to Richard? Gosh, I will marry her! Her day will be complete haywire yet when Richard is there, she will be so relieved and instead of sharing her stressful day, she will be asking how his day is going and they just enjoy each others company a lot.
Because if you think about it, nothing is going to happen even if you dump all your stress on your loved ones. The stress will still be there and you will have to handle it on your own anyway. So why must we dump all of our worries to our better half or to our loved ones?
Instead, whenever you meet your loved ones, try to build a happy vibe with them. Be relieved that they are next to you and enjoy the moment. Avoid dumping your stress and anger on them. Again, sharing our stress is way different from projecting our anger.
How different?
Sharing our stress means just telling the details of our stuff.
Projecting our anger is more of shouting to our loved ones just because we are going through something serious.
So yeah. Perhaps, if I knew this way earlier, I could have had built a much deeper connection with my loved ones. After this, I will surely try to work on that. I hope this founding of mine will inspire you too ;)
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